One question that has come up repeatedly the past few years is “How To Be Happy Alone?” As in, hanging out in a place all by yourself with no one else around. This can have a huge impact on a person’s mental health. All these lockdowns, travel restrictions, and the acute awareness of the risks to health have made all of us SUPER anxious, depressed, and feeling more isolated than ever.
Let’s be clear. We’re not talking about voluntary “me time” when a person chooses to be alone. This is involuntary aloneness. Some people absolutely love their alone time. Others loathe it! Being alone does not necessarily mean you are lonely. But if it is forced, loneliness can be detrimental!
In a Statista survey a huge number of respondents in lots of countries around the world stated that they felt lonely at least some of the time.
Again, some people choose to be alone. And that’s totally great and their choice. Some people choose to be alone right after getting out of a relationship, or if they want to focus on their own mental health, or if they decide to concentrate on their career, or if they identify as asexual or aromantic. But even during deliberate alone time, loneliness can still happen.
Loneliness isn’t just an occasional bummer, it can have some SUPER serious effect on our minds and bodies.
Prof. John Cacioppo, a social neuroscientist at the University of Chicago, explained why loneliness can be such a perilous state of mind. “It’s dangerous, as a member of a social species, to feel isolated, and our brain snaps into self-preservation mode,” he said. “That brings with it some unwanted and unknown effects on our thoughts and our actions toward others.”
But it’s not just in your head! You can feel loneliness throughout your body!
Loneliness makes us more prone to physical illness. A study from 2018 found that isolation was linked to a higher risk of dementia, while a 2020 study connected feelings of loneliness to a higher risk of diabetes. And if that’s not depressing enough – if people can’t kick that sense of loneliness, it may have even MORE dire consequences. Like, early mortality consequences!
Before we dive into some ways to be happy alone – Don’t Hesitate To Ask For Help!
Sometimes, even if we try really hard to counteract loneliness, it can be terribly overwhelming. If that ever happens, it is important to acknowledge it and get support. There are quite a few online options for mental health support, many that come free of cost.
And if you are coping with loneliness remember to be kind and compassionate to yourself.
How To Be Happy Alone
- Learn something new. Alone time can feel incredibly draining to some people because they don’t know what to do with this “free” time. One great option is to distract your mind with fresh new knowledge or a hobby. Whether it is reading, painting or dancing or taking a new class – there are many options for learning something new. One great option is Alison.com. This educational site offers FREE classes, certifications and even diplomas. Whatever new knowledge you pursue, it can greatly benefit you! Learning can help improve your brain function, help you gain confidence, and have fun! All this can help you be happy alone.
- Avoid Comparison. Ahem…this is where social media can come into play. Comparing yourself to others will only lead to low self esteem and disappointment. Remember everyone is different. Most people are fighting their own battles behind closed doors and dwell on their own personal flaws. Do not measure your happiness by the perceived happiness or success of others! Getting back to the idea of being alone. Imagine there was NO ONE left on earth. Sure you’re lonely, but you’re also the BEST. At everything! There’s no one to compare yourself to. You are unique and free! And guess what. That’s already true! You are one-of-a-kind. There’s no one else exactly like you! So why compare? All it does it eliminate gratitude and eclipse all your fantastic you-ness!
- Treat Yourself. Maybe you’re busy, or stressed or burdened with loneliness. Whatever you’re going through, if you’re reading this you deserve to be pampered a bit! A little pampering can help you relax and feel better. Perhaps you can do a home manicure or a little home spa treatment. Enjoying a little self-indulgence can help lower your blood pressure, reduce stress hormones, ease tense muscles, boost your mental energy and increase your confidence. Whew! That’s quite a marvelous list of consequences from just one mud mask! Though personally, I’m a huge fan of home spa kits complete with candles, exfoliating scrubs and more!
- Get Active. Yup! Time to get off the couch. I know, I don’t feel like getting up either when I’m feeling lonely. But when we exercise, the body releases chemicals that boost a sense of well-being and suppress hormones that cause stress and anxiety. What’s that?! Exercise pushes down the bad stuff and boosts the good stuff? Yup! Among the chemicals released are endorphins, serotonin, and dopamine neurotransmitters which are related to pain and depression emotions. You don’t have to go nuts and take up an intense training program. Go for a walk. Stretch. That’s it! Whew! For a moment I was worried I was going to have to break a sweat.
- Be Creative. Grab your crayons, colored pencils and paint brushes! It’s time to get artsy and paint away your loneliness! Whether you draw, paint, or color coloring books – it’s time to unlock your inner artist. Being creative improves your problem-solving skills in all areas of your life and work. Instead of coming from a linear, logical approach, your creative side can approach a situation from all angles. Creativity helps you see things differently and better deal with uncertainty. Studies show that creative people are better able to live with the insecurity of loneliness because they can adapt their thinking to allow for the unknown. Remember, art is not just for “creative-types”! Even if you don’t think you are artistically inclined, you can always grab a coloring book! The image is already begun and ready for you to add color. Shameless plug in 3, 2, 1 – Want to color to get out of your lonely slump TODAY? Order a printable coloring page from my Coloring Shop! Lovely hand-drawn art you can easily print and color right now! Download HERE.
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About Artistry By Lisa Marie:
Artistry By Lisa Marie is a small art studio located in Rochester, NY. It currently consists of Lisa Marie, a hoard of colored pencils and her two small boys (her husband John is a computer geek with no artistic skill and has bowed out of the art business). Lisa Marie has been professionally creating art for over a decade and has created an extensive library of stunning hand-drawn coloring pages, all available for digital download. While she has a Master’s in Art History and can talk your ear off about the Old Masters, her background is custom pet portraits and beautiful coloring pages. Her main interests are encouraging creativity and helping colorists release their inner artist and relax.
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